me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize