You're completely useless in the revolution.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
