When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
This is the high leading the old right now
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize