and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
