I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Randomize
