I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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