Four minutes until I can fart!
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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