I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
