This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
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