looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize