Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
