I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
