Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
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