it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
