why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
That reminds me...we need to get swords
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
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