tell your sister to shave her snatch
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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