My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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