Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
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