butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I want to stick my p in your. b.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
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