i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
