I wannas sexs uuuuu
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Randomize
