DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
