; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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