real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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