We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
