i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
