i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize
