I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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