I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
