Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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