One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize