Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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