I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I just had sex on a roof
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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