Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Randomize
