He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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