Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Randomize
