Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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