butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
