hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
