brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
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