is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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