Who wears a wallet chain?!
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
