I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
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