We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
