O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize