Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Randomize
