Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
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