I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
