Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
