I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
