Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
